Women are More Autonomous…really?

Attention children: ask your parents to pre-read this first.

I am not the best organized person – not even biologically, I have a whacky irregular period and so so fertility.  So I found out I was pregnant 3 years ago by realizing that you don’t have motion sickness for weeks at a time.  I was rather dreading the maternal care as an over 35 year old.  Here come the fussy nannies.  My Mother-in-law said, “they are so used to older mothers now, you will be fine.”

We scheduled the ultrasound to figure out how far along I was, and brought M and B along for a family greeting of the new baby.  The ultrasound tech nixed that idea, it was the other sort of wand, and small examination room.  I hadn’t heard of the other sort of wand with the last pregnancy, at my old Ob/Gyn’s who had moved away, this sounded ominous.  No wonder I’d been allowed to use the bathroom!  So B was put in charge of M in the waiting room and DH and I squeezed into the examination room that was about the size of a closet.  I saw my baby and said, “Aww!” the sonogram technician gasped, “That’s no 5 week old baby! You’re 11 weeks!  You have to sign these papers…you have to see the genetic councilor, NOW”

Did I mention that my handwriting is as bad as my organizational skills and that my 37 looked like 42?  So much for the compliment I heard lately that I looked the same as I did in High School: I must have looked 42  in 1985.

DH rejoined the boys, in fact he took them for a walk since the waiting room’s charms had LONG ago worn off for them.  The genetic councilor smiled kindly.  I took a deep breath and attempted to be clear, brave and non-self-righteous.

“I’m not going to abort this baby if he or she has three heads, so, we don’t need to rush on any tests unless they will help us care for the child better.  I’m a Christian.”

I get wordy when nervous, so I probably mentioned early church tradition and being consistent with Christ’s teaching even though abortion is not specifically addressed by name in the New Testament…

Continuing to smile kindly, the councilor got up and shut the office door.  I got more nervous.

“I find your attitude refreshing.” She said, in a quiet voice,”It used to be that when a-girl-in-trouble came to us, she was with her mother.  Now it’s usually with her-boyfriend-who-is-5-years-older-than-she-is-and-who-tells-her-what-to-do.  I don’t think this is making women more free.”